We are a foster home and have been for many years. In other words, we do not experience ourselves as foster parents, but as parents. The child, who has lived with us almost his entire life, is as big and important a part of the family as the rest of us. We love the child as if it were our biological child and will never stop standing up for him. But legally we are a foster home, and in practice we are lawless. It is not the children, but the surrounding system that is the problem. A system that has made life difficult for many foster families in recent years. This has happened in particular after the judgments of the human rights court in Strasbourg (EMD). Among other things, Norway has been condemned for determining that there is too little contact between children and biological parents. The question is whether Norway is now on completely wild roads when this is now to be tried to be corrected. In recent years, the amount of contact has increased in a number of cases, without the “system” seeming particularly concerned with what this is doing to the children. The children’s voices seem to be drowned out. In a new foster home survey, almost six out of ten foster homes say that they cannot recommend, or are unsure whether they can recommend others to become a foster home. It also emerges that close to 30 per cent of foster parents have felt pressured to force children to spend time with their biological parents. Is it any wonder that many foster homes cannot recommend others to take on such an assignment? We didn’t become a foster home to be pressured into forcing children to do something they don’t want, and something some children may also be afraid of. It is illegal to force children to be together (p. 269). The Convention on the Rights of the Child, which states among other things that children have the right to influence in matters that concern them, has certainly been completely forgotten. This despite the fact that it is enshrined in Norwegian law. As foster parents, you do not have the right to appeal against decisions concerning the child. You do not get party rights in connection with legal proceedings. You do not even have the right to appeal if it is decided that the child should move from the foster home, even if the child has lived there since he was a child and knows no other reality. Even if the reason is not in the foster home, but where the reason for the move is financial priorities or biological parents’ demands. Claims for restitution or an increase in visitation by the biological parents can be made every year and a half until the child is 18. What does this do to the children, who never have peace in their lives? In these processes, the foster families are obliged to appear as witnesses in court and in court, to open their homes and lives to experts, psychologists, case managers and others, no matter how often this happens. Many feel completely invaded, and many children and foster families have had a completely different life from what they were imagined to be. Some live in constant fear and crisis. We would like to emphasize that it is not the biological parents that we are criticizing. It is not their fault that current practice enables a system that ignores children and others. It is child protection, the tribunals and the legal system that are the decision-makers when, for example, parents demand more contact. Many believe that in recent years the child’s rights have been disregarded to a greater extent, and more contact has been granted (chapter 3.5) than what some children tolerate or want. It is also not individual employees in the child welfare services that we criticize. Many people really do their best to do a good job for everyone involved. We also know that many child welfare workers agree that Norway is now heading in the wrong direction, because what is happening affects the children. We also know of child welfare workers who quit their jobs because they can’t bear to be part of a system that no longer works for the children. The number of children with emergency decisions and decisions about taking over care has decreased in recent years. The number of children who are returned to their biological parents is increasing, according to figures that Aftenposten has obtained from the Central Unit for the County Boards. Are you sure that children’s needs and children’s voices are sufficiently taken care of when you now change practice? Law professor Elisabeth Gording Stang is also one of those who have expressed concern about the children this concerns. Around 200 children queued this spring to get a good, safe and loving foster home. There is talk of a foster care crisis. Why does so-called child-friendly Norway throw both children and foster homes under the bus? The children are now in some cases being let down by the systems that were supposed to help them. And the foster parents, who are often the closest to the children, are thus placed on the sidelines without rights to help the child. The Norwegian authorities must change course, and the government and the Minister for Children must clarify how Norway will emphasize the rights of the child. The rights of the parents are important, but the children should not lose their rights for that reason. There must be an immediate end to coercion! There must be an end to children and foster families living year after year on hold, without ever being able to be sure where the child will live. Foster families must be given legal rights to appeal against decisions concerning the child and the foster family. Who else will stand up for the children? We love the child who lives with us and will never stop being the child’s safe care base and the child’s confidants. We must always be for the child what the child calls us: Mum and Dad. We will never stop fighting for him. A few years ago we considered becoming a foster home for one more child. But do we want to take on such a mission again in the way that children and foster families are now treated? Never. news Ytring knows the identity of the foster parents.
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