She has received an offer in an SMS. If she says yes, her family gets a free place to live. If she follows her heart and says no, the whole family may end up on the streets of Istanbul. Where they live as undocumented refugees. The Sahar is in its mid-twenties, and just a few months ago, life was good and worries small. Life in the Afghan capital Kabul was smooth, compared to the current situation. FURTHER BACK: Most of all, Sahar will return to life as it was in Afghanistan. The picture is from when she lived in Kabul. Photo: Private Recently, authorities and organizations in several countries have issued warnings that private individuals can rape refugees seeking transport or shelter in connection with the war in Ukraine. But the problem has been there for a long time. For criminal networks have always exploited the situation of people in need to find new victims of forced labor, begging and prostitution. Most of those bought and sold in the human traffickers’ market are women and girls. And war and crisis are almost always the cause, according to a UN report from 2020. Istanbul can shine on the surface. But the city of millions has always had an underworld of refugees, who have come wave after wave over the centuries. This is the story of a young, unmarried Afghan refugee. These are her experiences and her version of her own life, as she has told news. The good life in Kabul Outside the big house in Kabul, two cars were parked. Inside the door, the maid kept order for the family. – We had a very good time. We had good advice and we were part of the middle class, says Sahar, where she is sitting in a cafe in Istanbul. Many hundreds of miles away and what feels like a completely different life. For the house and the cars were not all they owned. Outside the city they had large tracts of land. There they grew grapes, cherries, apples and almonds. Sometimes they also harvested tomatoes, beets, cucumbers and watermelons. Sahar and family loved to gather friends and family for big dinners. They also loved lavish weddings. Where they put on make-up and showed off their finest dresses. Sometimes women and men celebrated separately, other times they were together. As in the last wedding she was in before she met escape the country. In the big home they were invited along with 50-60 other guests. One man played the drums, another the stringed instrument rubab. The men danced in a large ring, and a couple of the women joined in, but most sat and watched. Some of the women had covered their hair, others did not. The hosts served Afghan rice and lamb. This was the life she knew. A good life. And in her world, women were strong. But life was going to change dramatically. When everything changed It was in August last year that it happened. A group of Taliban soldiers was standing on the steps outside the house. They had come to take the family’s property, Sahar says. The Islamic fundamentalist movement, with its strict interpretations of sharia and very conservative views of women, had taken control of Afghanistan and now also their hometown of Kabul. – Father trembled with fear, while I was very scared and cried. When the Taliban started killing people, everyone was just trying to save themselves. Sahar trembles in his voice. Hands hold on to the tea glass as we sit in a busy cafe in Istanbul. The Taliban had little left for people who were liberal and educated. People like her family. And they had already noticed that. The big brother was a rock in her life. He had learned English by reading short stories, gaming and games. And had advised the sister to do the same. It is now two years since he disappeared in Afghanistan. He had in fact clearly said “No” when the Islamist movement tried to recruit him as a soldier. He believed that the fundamentalists in the Taliban were not true to Islam. It had consequences. The family still does not know if he is alive, and the longing for him is enormous. He had been 30 years now. The Escape In the absence of an older brother and with old and sick parents, it is the Sahar who must make all the decisions on behalf of the family. The decision was escape. At full speed, they packed up and allied themselves with neighbors and friends who were also going. Sahar says that they had heard on TV that Turkey received all refugees and gave everyone a place to live. Little did they know that the reality was completely different. Private Much of the way they had to walk, and the path over the mountains of Iran was very dangerous. They spent a total of 15 days on the trip. When they reached the Turkish border, they got another surprise. – The smugglers went through all the contents of our bags and took what they found of value. They stole our cell phones and mother’s gold. The smugglers, who had now led them towards the border fence on the Iranian side, were ready for their last job. Sahar says: They cut up the fence, made a hole. And let them in to Turkey. – Mom and I cried. We were excited but mostly scared. Sahar – The smugglers went through all the contents of the bags and took what they found. We had to destroy the passports because they did not want anything to point back at them. Sahar A few days later, the three arrived in Istanbul. With them they had only one bag each, but without anything that could be turned into money. But the problems had only just begun. – Can you teach me English? I have to pay for the tuition. It was the boss who talked to Sahar who stood at the ironing board and folded clothes. She had managed to get a job at a factory that made children’s clothes in Istanbul, but without ID papers she had to work illegally to get money for food and rent. A few days before, another man at the factory had grabbed her hand and held on. Now, a few days later, she was standing in the boss’s office and he did the same. He grabbed her hand and pulled her to him. Sahar was ashamed and stopped the day. Thus, there was also an end to the income. Sahar gets stressed when she talks about this. She is crying and looks down shamefully. She finds it very uncomfortable to rip up what happened and does not want to describe more details. She also did not dare to report the episode. That women on the run are vulnerable and abused, she had already seen on the way to Turkey. – When we were on the road, women who went alone were taken into their own houses by smugglers and other men. I swear to God, I’m not safe anywhere. Nowhere are women on the run safe. But still she has not experienced the worst. The landlord’s obscene offer Sahar was now without work and income. When the family of three first arrived in Istanbul, they moved into an apartment with a Pakistani family already working in Turkey. First, they paid 1,000 Turkish lira (about 700 kroner) a month. But then the Pakistani family moved out. Then the owner raised the rent to 2500 lira (approximately 1700 NOK). Without income, it was now difficult to pay the new rent, but the landlord has a proposal. – The landlord says that if I marry him, we will be allowed to live for free. Then we will have a bigger house and we will not have to worry about anything. So in exchange for her becoming his second wife, they will be allowed to live for free. The homeowner “proposed” with a text message in Turkish translated into English with google translate. Because he does not speak English. – He is well into his 50s, over twice as old as me and married before. He has a daughter my age and wants me to be his second wife, Sahar says indignantly. The homeowner is rich and owns many homes in Istanbul. Sahar’s mother was not entirely opposed to the idea that the daughter could become his second wife to secure the family’s roof over her head, but according to Sahar “not with this homeowner”. The mother suggested this one day she was afraid of what might happen to them. But would you be someone’s second wife? – No! But so many see that I am vulnerable. I am a young unmarried woman who is alone with old and sick parents, without money. What do you do if your parents see it as the only way to get married to support them? – Father does not say such things, but mother is afraid of what will happen to us. My parents are getting weaker day by day. Now he weighs only 54 kg. It also consumes me. This is what the homeowner sees. He does not give up and this week he sent new text messages: Landlord: You are the most beautiful and precious woman in the world. Landlord: I hope I do not disturb you, Inshallah. Landlord: Now I come to rent for 3000 lira. Homeowner: What do you think about my rental price? Homeowner: Do you have a money problem? I have a big house with a garden. You’re old enough to marry me. I want to give you a house. And a car and a horse. The landlord thinks he has given the family a good offer. But she would rather commit suicide than become his second wife. If the price of caring for your parents would be to marry a married man, would you pay that price? – It is very difficult. That will mean my life is over. Finished. Then I will have no reason to live any longer. So NO. It’s better to die than to be someone’s second wife. For then there is no respect nor life. Sahar continues to fight in her own way and tries to get help where she can. Now she hopes to soon be able to travel to Ankara and finally get ID papers sent from Afghanistan. Then she can get a proper job and pay the bills. – Most of all, I want to continue my studies. I want a safe life and for my parents to get the medicine they need. And Sahar wants to find out for herself who she is going to marry. Protectors become abusers The history of the Sahar is not unique. The human rights organization Amnesty is behind a report on how women on the run are being exploited. – Those who try to exploit the women and girls, and who commit abuse, are everything from the human traffickers that they are at the mercy of being able to trust, to other refugees with whom they travel. The women also experience pressure and attempts at exploitation by security personnel at border crossings, says Beate Ekeløve-Slydal, Political Adviser at Amnesty to news. Following the large influx of refugees in 2015, Amnesty interviewed more than 40 women and girls who had fled Syria and Iraq to Europe via Turkey, Greece and through the Balkans. Common to all was that they felt threatened and insecure on the journey. In almost all countries, they were subjected to harassment, violence and sexual abuse. Men also tried to exploit them financially. For both Sahar and others, it is difficult and shameful to talk about this. – Having been subjected to rape and sexual abuse is very taboo, and traumatic experiences that women and girls therefore often do not tell about, says Ekeløve-Slydal. news has chosen not to confront the homeowner with the allegations made in this article because it could put Sahar and her parents in a very difficult situation. This is therefore Sahar’s version of what has happened and her experiences.
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– Your family will be allowed to stay for free if you marry me – Urix
