In the chronicle “Tråkk på ADHD-bremsen” the authors from BUP write about the danger that far too many people are diagnosed with ADHD. As the mother of a child with ADHD, I think it is important that parents are not afraid to seek help for fear of being mistrusted. In the same text, it is stated that the diagnosis is largely based on subjective information from teachers and parents. But what about the children? I have the benefit of talking to parents of children with ADHD, where the child himself has not felt and expressed major difficulties both to parents, school and BUP. Children who suffer from inner chaos and unrest. Some children remain undiagnosed until they are adults with the consequences this entails. As parents, you are completely weathered where you are constantly standing on the battlefield to help the children. Before the child is diagnosed, we do a number of things: We read countless books on child rearing and scour the web for solutions that can help. We create systems for predictability and continuity. We reward and design crisis plans when the child acts out among others. We guide in situations children of the same age have learned long ago. We fight every morning to get the children to school. We have countless telephone conversations with the school and PPT. We pay for our own online courses, and take parental guidance courses through the municipality. We do what the authors request, and try to get the children involved in countless activities (which don’t work). We limit screen use (although this may be the only form of charging and rest time these children have). We give Melatonin after years of measures to get the children to sleep, but the symptom pressure during the day remains the same. We look and look, and dream of change without it happening, and as a last resort, the children are applied to BUP. We sit there with our heads down and are ashamed that we cannot achieve what other parents apparently manage. And the shoulders are high after years of stares and hints from others that more boundaries should be set, so that the child does not hit or use inappropriate language. You don’t see that every day we are yelled at, spat on and beaten, because we have children who are unable to regulate themselves WHEN we set boundaries. We lose jobs, friends and marriages break up because we are exhausted from being environmental therapists 24 hours a day. You don’t know that either. After many years of feeling like a failure in the parenting role, we end up with minimal self-confidence and uncertainty about our own parenting skills. It is particularly unfortunate for children with ADHD, who need stability and continuity. That professionals in the BUP system express themselves in the way the columnists do is disturbing and should trigger concern from the highest levels, by those responsible for health and care services. Families and children who seek out BUP need to be met with trust and respect. They do not need therapists who meet them with distrust, and a preconceived notion that parents, who have tried everything for a long time, want to influence the process leading up to a diagnosis. All we want is help so that our children can experience as meaningful a life as possible, and that we as a family can experience more good days than bad. Ultimately, it is BUP’s responsibility to ensure that the investigation is so good and sufficient that there is no doubt about the conclusion. So if more children get the diagnosis, because more are referred, BUP must search itself and its own competence rather than kicking down both teachers and parents, who only want the best for the children. Unfortunately, there are disastrous examples of the consequences of struggling children not being taken seriously. news Ytring knows the author’s identity. Also read:
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The children without brakes – Speech
