Have you ever given a gift to someone and received the following response in return; – What? I didn’t know we were supposed to give each other a gift. Or have you ever received a gift yourself and become stressed because you have nothing to give back? This year, more people in Norway have tighter finances than before, and an unexpected Christmas present can cause bigger problems than what was intended. It is something mother of five Malin Morfjord from Svolvær has experienced. – It will be wrong, she says about receiving a gift without giving anything in return. – I don’t like to receive without having something to give back. She works one hundred percent as a child and youth worker at a school. In addition, she takes on extra shifts as a waitress at a local restaurant. Nevertheless, Christmas presents must be downgraded this year. – Everything is more expensive now; food, electricity and diesel. In addition, I’ve been through a breakup, so now I’m alone with a big house. Activities rather than gifts Morfjord is not alone. In November, 42 percent answered that they will spend less money on Christmas shopping this year, according to a survey carried out on behalf of Virke. – Every year I have donated Christmas presents to Aksjon Juleglede. This year I got a present from them themselves, says Morfjord to news. There will not be as many Christmas presents under Norwegian Christmas trees this year, according to a survey carried out by Virke, the main organization for the trade and service industry. Photo: Karina Kaupang Jørgensen / news She even had a chat with those she was supposed to exchange gifts with. She has said that she does not have the opportunity to give the same back this year, and therefore does not want to receive anything either. In addition, she has encouraged the children to arrange activities with their friends, instead of giving each other things. Have you ever received an unexpected gift? Give, receive and reciprocate – Gifts confirm social bonds. If you suddenly do not give a gift, it is a signal that can cast doubt on the relationship. So says professor of sociology at Oslo Met, Anita Borch. Borch says Christmas gift giving is voluntary, but very strongly expected. Photo: Emrah Senel / news – It can feel like an obligation, so you can’t just stop. According to old gift theory, one has three obligations when it comes to gifts, says the sociologist; Give, receive and reciprocate. – When you give a gift, you also give something of yourself. If you receive but do not give anything back, then it creates an imbalance and you are in “debt”. Professor of sociology at Oslo Met, Anita Borch says it can be perceived as unpleasant not to return a gift. Photo: Gorm Kallestad / N Commercial services confirm relationships On the one hand, Christmas is about charity, family and children, says Borch. On the other side, we have the commercial Christmas and the shopping party, which many believe threatens the traditional Christmas. It may seem like stark opposites, but Borch believes it is not so black and white. – In modern society, we use these things to confirm. We use commercial services to verify the relationships. – The commercial gift is the ultimate sign of confirming social ties. – Great understanding in the gift network The number one advice is to get in touch and tell them how it is, says Borch. – In gift giving, it is open for those who have less to deal with to give less. Students, for example, have lower expectations. There is usually room for great understanding in the gift network. – But at least then you won’t have to see that doubt, says Borch. Debt of gratitude Professor of psychology at BI, Jan Ketil Arnulf, also says that we give gifts to each other to confirm the relationship we have. – The more social animals that give each other gifts to show that we are important to each other. – Say that you can’t receive any gifts this year, because you can’t afford to give anything back, urges Jan Ketil Arnulf. Photo: Trond Stenersen / news Gifts have a useful value, he explains. We give something the other person needs. Family shares with family and friends share with friends. – For people, gifts also have a symbolic meaning. There is not necessarily anything concrete you need. The gift is given to confirm the relationship. The reason why we feel that we must return the gift is because relationships should be mutual, says Arnulf. If you do not return a gift, it can be considered a hostile act. Therefore, it can lead to a form of debt of gratitude. However, Arnulf has some advice for you if you don’t feel that your wallet will last this year; – Firstly, it is a good idea to have a chat with those concerned, he encourages and adds: – You can say that; the best Christmas present we can give each other this year is not to give each other a present.
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Many have poorer finances – cannot afford to buy Christmas presents – news Nordland
