As a mother of three daughters, it was important for Live Nelvik not to erase her own surname. – Our children have surnames from both of us, but mine is in the middle, she says. In generous blinks, she treats her husband to it, since the babies have been inside her for 9 months. – He doesn’t have a womb, so that’s why he got the last surname, Live states. But if the kids want to hurry, they just use Sagen, named after their father. – Then it can annoy me that the children didn’t get my surname in the end, it comes straight from Live. Before she smiles again, and tell about a revenge. – I take a quiet revenge when I order labels for their clothes. They are only called Nelvik there! A recent survey by Norstat for news shows that 23% of us choose the father’s surname for the children. Only 2% prefer their mother. The trend with hyphens is growing, but father’s name is still strong, also among young people. Community versus identity? One who chose to change her name when she got married is Guro Helene. She and her husband Simen are now called only Bondevik. – I grew up with one surname, and I have always liked that my whole family has the same name, says Guro Helene. She wanted to carry on the tradition. – I love that we have the same last name. It underlines the feeling that we have chosen each other, Guro tells Helene. Photo: private But in the beginning the feelings were mixed. – It was a bit sad to let go of the part of myself that tells where I come from, she says. But she has no regrets. When Live Nelvik got married, a change of surname was not even considered. – I don’t think it’s so romantic to erase half of one’s identity, she asserts. – I chose to continue with my name, as that is my name, says Live Nelvik, who works as a program director at news. Photo: Robert Rønning / news Then she comes up with something, and laughs a little, before continuing. – But then I’m not very good at romance either. For example, I always forget our wedding day! Is it a problem that we don’t think about equality when we choose a surname? Yes! It seems that we do not take equality seriously! No! The choice of surname says nothing about how equal we are. Don’t know Show result Everything has a beginning. And the custom of the man’s surname started with a law. The law that became a tradition In the old days, it was common to take a surname after the farm you lived on. Surnames served as addresses. But the state struggled to know who was who. Problems piled up for those who ruled the country. The solution came with a law in 1923. The law said that women had to take their husband’s surname when they married. And that men had to stand their ground. It was not until 1979 that the law equalized the choice of surname. So why hasn’t it happened more? Men do not want to change their surname Kulturvitar Line Førre Grønstad has researched surnames. She points to three reasons. – An important reason is that the fight for equality has been about more practical things. As an equal right to work, and to organize home and children. – When the birth number was introduced in 1964, surnames actually only had a symbolic meaning, says cultural historian Line Førre Grønstad, who has researched surnames. Photo: Privat Another reason is that many men do not find it natural to change their name. They are not used to other men doing it, according to the researcher. The third reason concerns why women change their surname to a greater extent than men. – Women seem to take greater responsibility for signaling a community in the nuclear family, says Line Førre Grønstad. Nevertheless – the diversity in the choice of surname is increasing. Aesthetics and romance The fact that Norwegians are also boys who like boys was not taken into account when the law on surnames was made in 1923. Espen Bråten Kristoffersen and his girlfriend of eight years, Sindre Fløistad, toy with the idea of a joint surname. They are not married, not yet, but both think it is romantic. To be called the same. – We create an identity as a team then, says Espen. – It’s a tribute to love, to want to be called the same! That’s what they agreed on, the cohabiting couple Espen Bråten Kristoffersen and Sindre Fløistad. Photo: Robert Rønning / news They are still not safe. Both are soccer players. It can be vulnerable to change a name that you use for a living. But if they decide to change, the placement of the surname will be a problem for them. Or? – I think it would have been Bråten Fløistad, says Espen before he tells the reason: The most aesthetically pleasing sequence. But someone likes to think completely new, at the same time as they follow an ancient tradition. A new surname for both When Nina and Jon Kristian got married in 2022, they also only wanted one surname. The solution was to drop the surnames after their fathers. Instead, they took the name of the farm they live on. When Nina married Jon Kristian, she wore the wedding dress by Gunveig Jonsonhaugen, Jon Kristian’s grandmother whom he was so fond of. Photo: Joakim Mangen Solbakken and Halden had to give way to Jonsonhaugen. – It was a joint process, that we both changed our surname, says Nina Jonsonhaugen. Published 10/10/2024, at 11.19 Updated 10.10.2024, at 11.20
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Is it a problem that we don’t think about equality when we choose a surname? – news Trøndelag – Local news, TV and radio
