On January 12, I found myself scrolling through Etsy when, for some inexplicable reason, I was bombarded with suggestions for products that would never captivate my interest. Among them were spells and witchcraft profiles.
As someone who doesn’t subscribe to superstitions or religious beliefs, I’m skeptical about horoscopes, tarot cards, and other mystical practices. However, this particular find was too intriguing to ignore.
Are you telling me that a witch named Agatha has sold 1,600 spells on Etsy in just three months? And despite being a blatant gimmick, she has a five-star rating? It seems unlikely that I couldn’t turn my cat into a social media star for a mere couple of euros.
Join me in this esoteric adventure. Exciting developments await.
The Purchase, the Witch, and Preparations
My Etsy profile is quite reputable—14 years old and brimming with personal information. Naturally, the first step was to spruce it up with different details.
Allow me to introduce Julián Gómez, a fictional resident of Illán de Vacas, a small town in Toledo. Julián is deeply fond of his cat, Chihiro, who also happens to be my cat. Knowing that social media users adore cats, Julián has set out to make Chihiro an influencer, hoping for free treats and goodies. To that end, he created an Instagram account, @chihirolamasguapa, but his efforts were modest. Lacking skills in photography and video-making, he opted for a shortcut—purchasing a spell for social media popularity.
Julián decided to trust a shop called AgathaManifestation. The proprietor, Agatha Everveil, has a name that’s unmistakably witchy. She offers spells for everything from demonic protection to increasing popularity through ancient witchcraft.
The Agatha Manifestation Store | Image: Xataka
By the way, Agatha is not real either; her images have been generated by AI. This raises the question: How genuine is this marketplace?
The Cost of Magic
The spell I purchased is priced at €9.72, but a promotional discount brought it down to €2.43 until February 5. In addition to the standard spell duration of two to three months, I could pay extra for expedited service or a longer-lasting effect. As curious muggles, we opted for the basic package.
The spell advertises itself as a way to align your energy with online visibility and influence, making it easier to attract followers and recognition. The package promises:
- A personalized social media popularity spell.
- A ritual photo as proof.
- Spiritual guidance to maintain popularity.
- Energy cleansing for online presence.
While Waiting for the Spell
Agatha’s shop is located in California, but her business is registered out of Mississippi. The seller’s address appears to be a house that’s currently for sale. While I don’t question the legality of such offerings, Etsy does disclaim that spells and divination are purely for entertainment. This means that my purchase, while amusing, is essentially a gamble on spiritual charades.
Interestingly, all the shops offering similar services on Etsy display a pattern: generically AI-generated images, low prices, recent establishment dates, and an uncanny number of five-star reviews. This raises questions about transparency and authenticity in a marketplace purportedly built on handmade products.
The Witch Responds
Shortly after my purchase, Agatha sent a photo of the ritual, marking my order as complete. The accompanying message claimed that multiple steps had been taken to align energies for increased online engagement, using candles and herbs for intention setting.
However, many phrases in Agatha’s message felt vaguely generic and could easily apply to any situation. It was almost as if an AI had crafted a stock response that fit any spell context.
In essence, I spent two euros for a photo and some whimsical text that promised magic. Ultimately, it’s a reminder that while people might seek solace and answers in these practices, the lines between authenticity and marketing can become dangerously blurred in today’s digital marketplace. For Chihiro, the influencer dream remains unfulfilled.