– I can’t find the pictures myself, says Solveig Askjem as she rummages through old photo albums. She is trying to find the photos from when she entered into a partnership with her wife Vigdis Bunkholdt in 1994. But the photos are hidden in the many photo albums with memories from a long life. In 1994 they had a big celebration of partnership. As soon as the Marriage Act came in, they also became husband and wife on paper. This year they have been lovers for 50 years. And that should be celebrated. – We will celebrate with a huge cake and champagne, says Solveig. Together with friends and family, they will mark a long life together. – We will meet the senior group with other queers, and it will be fun. The married couple have been involved in major breakthroughs in the fight for equal rights. But we know almost nothing about how the married couple and other queers experience old age. Nor about how they are met by the care for the elderly. – We do not have any statistics of our own regarding older queers in Scandinavia. We actually don’t have that, says gender researcher Janne Bromseth. Lack of education During a long life together, the two 86-year-olds have experienced a lot of understanding and acceptance of who they are. – We’ve had nice “sailing weather”, says Vigdis. But they are still tired of what they call society’s commonplaces. – If you say you are married, you can be sure they will ask what your husband’s name is. Gender researcher Janne Bromseth is working to find out how much they know about queers in health and care education. She is employed as a specialist in queer knowledge in Fri Oslo and Viken. She says that it may not inspire confidence if health personnel ask such questions, as the couple tell about. – It is quite clear that most people have not gained any knowledge in their education about queer life courses and aging conditions, says Bromseth. For some, it can be more challenging to be open about who they are when they come to a nursing home. Therefore, many queer older people may be extra prone to feeling outside, she explains. – Some may find that their experiences are made invisible. They can also choose to adapt to the system and choose not to be open, says Bromseth. Married couple Vigdis and Solveig believe it is connected to how you are as a person. – I think it can also be linked to whether you accept yourself, says Solveig. Solveig Askjem believes queer older people will experience care for the elderly differently. Photo: Julie Helene Günther / news Because despite the fact that queers have more rights today, not everyone feels that they can be themselves. – I know several adults who are unable to come out of the closet, says Vigdis. Vigdis Bunkholdt says that they hear of several people who have challenges with being open about who they are. Photo: Julie Helene Günther / news A chosen family One of those who has no plans to hide who he is is Klaus Bøckman. A 75-year-old from Oslo who gets involved where he can and with what he does best. – I am not a typical pensioner. Several times a week he serves dinners in the church at Tøyen. He also leads the association “Homser i dagslys” for homosexuals over 50. Before retiring five years ago, he traveled the world working for a cruise ship. After over 30 years abroad, he has lost contact with his family, but that doesn’t bother him. – I have my chosen family, he says. There are ten people in the family, who have chosen each other. If Klaus ever goes to a nursing home, he will be treated with respect. – It is important that they understand my situation and show tolerance. He also keeps “Koko the third” company. So do the many gatherings with other older queers in Oslo. – I don’t have the world’s highest pension, but I must not turn my back on the krone. If I fancy a glass of red wine, I’ll have it. It is important that the healthcare system actively shows that they have good attitudes towards queers, believes the gender researcher. – They can invite openness by using rainbow symbols and using gender-neutral language. The painting of Svolvær adorns the apartment in central Oslo. The picture was given to his great-grandfather as a gift and is the only thing he has left of the family. Photo: Julie Helene Günther / news Klaus agrees with that. He hopes that the health and care services are aware of what they can do to make them feel included. Want more research Many older queers have also previously had negative experiences with the healthcare system or know others who have. – The health and care services must actively build trust in queer older people, says gender researcher Bromseth. A selection of newspaper articles from Dagbladet and VG. The articles are from the period 1970 to the 1990s. Photo: Faksimile Dagbladet/VG There is very little research on queer elderly people in Norway. Bromseth believes that different life experiences should have been a more prioritized part of research on the elderly in Norway. – Older queers may be prone to receiving a negative response to themselves. Some have a distant relationship with family, and many do not have children of their own. One battle left to fight Married couple Vigdis and Solveig are not too worried about what may come their way in care for the elderly. But they are clear that there is still a battle left to fight for queers. – There is a lot of acceptance on the surface, but you shouldn’t scratch that far into the veneer before attitudes come to light that are not quite so positive, says Vigdis. She believes the battle today is about people’s attitudes. – It is one of the most difficult things in the world to change, she says. Hi Did you think of anything in particular when you read this case? I work with diversity at news and would like to hear from you! Please send me an email. All information is treated confidentially.
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Calls for more research on queer elderly – news Oslo og Viken – Local news, TV and radio
