– Even though I was there, it really just feels like a dream, if I may say so. It’s so unreal. Mira has turned 17. Almost a year ago, she celebrated the New Year at her mother’s house in Sørfold, together with her older brother, half-sister and stepfather. The guests had left and Mira had actually gone to bed, when she was awakened by the noise on the floor above. Up there, she saw her mother and stepfather with serious knife injuries. Inflicted by Mira’s older brother. Mira ended up locking herself in the bathroom. From there she called the police, and she called her father Torbjørn, who lives in Vesterålen, five hours away. While she was sitting there in the bathroom, her older brother also killed himself. – Sometimes the grief is so intense. My mom and older brother were two of the closest people in my life. I could talk to them about anything. If we weren’t in the same house, they were just a phone call away, says Mira. The tragedy in Sørfold was the big news when we entered a new year in January. A 19-year-old who killed his stepfather, mother and himself. Mira’s 11-year-old half-sister was sent to hospital with knife injuries. Mira was the only one to come out of the dramatic night without physical injuries. The police have investigated the case without finding the answer to why it happened. Mira thinks that’s perfectly fine. But the loss is just as great anyway. – It is very painful. And very unreal, still. I really can’t understand how something like that could happen. Now, almost a year later, Mira talks about life without half her family. And what happened when she met dad in Sørfold on New Year’s Day. The Christmas star hung in the window and the Christmas tree was decorated in the living room while the police investigated the murder that shook the whole country on New Year’s Day. Photo: Petter Strøm / news – Then I snapped The meeting took place a little later in the day, 1 January. Mira had visited the Orphanage in Fauske. She had been checked at the emergency room. The then 16-year-old girl felt numb. – I remember being so afraid that my life was completely ruined. That things were not going to be the same. That now everything had gone under, she says. Dad Torbjørn had driven all the way from Vesterålen that night. Now he was in a small room at the town hall in Sørfold. Chairs, sofa and quite a few other people. – It was a very strong meeting. She came into the room and the first thing she said was “Daddy, we’ll manage this”, says Torbjørn. – That’s when I also started to understand a little. Both what had happened and what the consequences were. Of course it was very touching. So then I broke down. Not mad at him Details from what Mira experienced that night, she doesn’t want to talk too much about. It will be too private. But as she sees it, no one could have predicted what happened when her brother became a murderer. And afterwards took his own life. – That is what hurts so much. And of course a feeling that it is unfair that it should happen. – What have you thought of your older brother afterwards? – I have not been mad at him once. I’ve really only noticed that it’s very sad. How sad it is that something like that should happen. He was the kindest boy you could find. He was an absolutely wonderful person. A very caring person. And a very good big brother. For Mira, this is important to be able to say: – And for me, who was there when it happened, I can only say that I am not mad at him. But the past year has been demanding for the 17-year-old. Mira with dad Torbjørn close behind. I don’t understand how it works, really. He has been very steady and a very safe person to have around. And very good at putting things into words. Yes, he has truly been a hero. Yes, I would say that. Photo: Ola Helness / news Took half a year to understand Her helpers have been many. The crisis team in Sørfold and Bodø closely followed the family towards the funeral. Mira has been helped by a psychologist at Barnehuset. – Now I go to BUP and get very good help there. It’s nice to have someone outside who can listen to what you have to say. Maybe they have slightly different views. They often come with very good advice, she says. The half-sister, who was also in the house that night, still lives in Sørfold with her uncle and aunt. Mira, on the other hand, has moved. Now she lives with her father and his wife Åsta, together with Mira’s two younger half-siblings, in Vesterålen. She has started a new school. – Siblings are one of the most important things there is, says Mira. She has siblings both in Vesterålen, Sørfold and Fauske. And an older brother who died on New Year’s Eve. Photo: Ola Helness / news – At the start I thought it was really difficult. It was painful to have to leave my friends, school and family in Sørfold. I was very scared, she says. – It’s something I’m very happy about now, because I’m enjoying myself very well. I have made many new friends and met many new, nice people. She talks about a class where everyone can be with others. Also in the afternoons. In addition, Mira spends a lot of time in the mountains with her father. There she feels mastery, gets the endorphins flowing in her blood and gets her thoughts sorted. And then Mira has the music. Songs that bring back memories, that take her back to good times with her mother and older brother. Happy music, such as Sondre Justad, which lifts the mood. – And then I like to dance. But the fact that her older brother and mother are gone didn’t really dawn on her until this summer. And the memories still flow in, in waves. – There are days when I don’t know what to do with myself. It directly hurts. And then I can have good periods, where I can look at pictures, where I am not drowning in sadness. – Have you become more mature? – Yes. I will say that. I have grown a lot from what has happened. I have done things and been through things that are not normal for a 17-year-old to go through. Among other things, she has learned a lot about other people. And who she can lean on. Mira’s older brother was buried at the same time as mum and stepfather. In the church, there were several wreaths dedicated just to the 19-year-old. Photo: Petter Strøm / news Has felt like air Mira tells about the time after the tragedy. About the support she received from people around her. The messages, the hugs, the kind words. The care that gradually became less visible. – There have been times when I have almost felt like air, that I have not been present, she says. – People move on with their lives. While we, who were part of it, are in a way still stuck. We’re still in it, sort of. Others have shown their best side. Mira has friends she can lean on. People who listen when she needs it. Which can put her in a better mood, and get her mind on other things. – There really isn’t that much that is needed. A pat on the shoulder, or a hug, or something like that. And there is a lot to look forward to for the 17-year-old. Willing to help others The class on health and parenting has had a big impact. Because Mira dreams of becoming a nurse. – Then I can continue to help other people. Maybe other people who end up in similar situations. It is something I want most, to be able to help others. – And show that it is possible to get through such things as well? – Yes. Even though it can feel extremely heavy and dark, and it can do so for a long time afterwards, you have to keep fighting. You can get it right again. That is part of the reason why she wants to tell her story. Father Torbjørn has already done it. It’s kind of a mantra in the family. Both Torbjørn and his daughter Mira have told about their experiences surrounding the Sørfold tragedy on the night of 1 January. Photo: Ola Helness / news – Transparency is a good thing. It makes everything harmless in a way. I think it’s just very important not to go and carry things inside, says Mira. In addition, her family made an active choice early on that they should be able to live a good life. Rejoice in the little things, that they have each other. In the days after the tragedy, they met on the sofa every night to watch TV. Series such as “71 degrees north” and “Maskorama”. They still do that as often as they can. And every Friday there are tacos. – Small things that make you feel the feeling that life is good too, says the 17-year-old. – The fact that you have managed what you do, it seems almost incomprehensible to the rest of us? – Yes, it is something that I have also thought about. If it wasn’t me who was in this situation myself, I would probably think the same thing: How is it going, like? But I think it has a lot to say about how you think. If you want something and decide to do it, it’s amazing how much you can achieve. For example, Mira and her family have decided how they will try to handle New Year’s Eve this year. Torbjørn has stood steadily by his daughter’s side throughout this year. Mira thinks he has taken a lot of responsibility and tidied things up. Photo: Ola Helness / news Already feel the Christmas spirit – There will always be a day that is going to be painful. But we have plans for things to do. We will take it easy, be together. Try not to make a big deal out of it. Then I’ll see how it goes. – Because you dread that a little? – Yes, a little. But before that time comes Christmas. A holiday that makes Mira light up. Christmas calendars on TV are important to Mira and her family. Here she looks together with half-sister Elida and father Torbjørn. Photo: Trude Furuly / news My mother was like that too. She baked, decorated and arranged. – The Christmas joy she had was so good to see, says Mira. She is looking forward to watching all the Christmas movies she always watches. “Love Actually”. “Home Alone”. Movies she used to watch with her older brother. She looks forward to decorating the Christmas tree on Christmas Eve, listening to Christmas music and just being with those she cares about the most. – I love Christmas. I have decided that I will not let Christmas be ruined, says Mira. – Of course it will be painful. It will be my first Christmas celebration without my older brother, and without my mother either there or calling me. But at the same time, I have already felt the Christmas spirit, and that I am looking forward to Christmas. So I think that’s a good sign. Do you need to talk to someone? Mental health Youth chat: https://mentalhelseungdom.no/trenger-du-noen-a-snakke-med/chat/ Mental health helpline: 116 123 The Church’s SOS helpline: 22 40 00 40 Acute risk of suicide? Call 113 when it is urgent and your life is at stake. Call the emergency room on tel. 116117 for immediate assistance. The concern telephone for adults and children: 810 03 940 The Red Cross’ telephone for children and young people: 800 33 321 You can also chat with professionals on websites such as korspahalsen.no, sidetmedord.no or skankkompsyken.no
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